Sunday, November 2, 2008

James Bond: Commie Smasher!

BOULDER, Colorado -- Finally, an item about Russia, which is what this blog is sort of supposed to be about (I've been meaning to write something explaining the meaning of the name and the purpose of the blog, but my counterpart and I have been distracted). Anyway, a bunch of dipshit communists in St. Petersburg told the newest Bond girl, Ukraine's Olga Kurylenko, that she was some sort of predatel for participating in a movie franchise that has been on the front lines of the West's war against the commies.

According to the letter posted on their website, Kurylenko should be ashamed for sharing the screen with James Bond, a man who has "killed hundreds of Soviet people and citizens of other countries of the socialist camp - Cubans, Vietnamese, North Koreans, Chinese and Nicaraguans."

James Bond kills nationals from the countries listed in the following films: Cubans in Octopussy, Vietnamese in Tomorrow Never Dies, North Koreans in Die Another Day, Chinese in Goldfinger, and he kills Russians in nearly every movie. I have not been able to find evidence of him killing any Nicaraguans - the closest he comes is when worst James Bond ever Timothy Dalton fights drug lords from the idiotically-named "Republic of Isthmus" in License to Kill, which is presumably Panama, not Nicaragua.

The Times of London reported on this story. This group, which calls themselves the Communists of St. Petersburg and Leningrad Region, is a very small splinter of the Communist Party of the Russian Federation, and they are much more radical and angry. This is really just a funny little piece of agitprop from a fringe group, but it is not really a story. I had been hoping that they were a made up political party who had duped the Times, but they are actually legit. There are some great satirical parties in the former Soviet Union, and this is probably the best one, the Dnieper-Donetsk Workers Party (PDRS) of Ukraine.

Regardless of what Barack Obama's political bedfellows may say, I am still excited to see Quantum of Solace.

[The Times: Soviet die hards see red over 'betrayal' by 007 girl Olga Kurylenko]

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