Friday, November 14, 2008

Greatest Sports Journalism Commentary Blog Closes, Joe Morgan Still Employed

BOULDER, Colorado -- The blogosphere and the baseball world are far, far poorer today. The authors of Fire Joe Morgan - a site dedicated to exposing the incompetence and mental illness of ESPN's premiere baseball analyst, as well as of many other sports media types who suck at their jobs (John Heyman, Bill Plaschke, Woody Paige, Hatguy) - announced that they would no longer be updating the site. It will be a long winter trying to figure out how I am going to get through next year's baseball season without line-by-line dissection of every one of Joe Morgan's online chats. The sad farewell follows:

Hello, everyone.

After 21 years, and almost 40 million posts (we'll have to check those numbers, but it's something like that), we have decided to bring FJM to an end.

Although we have not lost our borderline-sociopathic joy for meticulously criticizing bad sports journalism, the realities of our professional and personal lives make FJM a time/work luxury we can no longer afford.

We started this site with two purposes: to make each other laugh, and to aid and abet the Presidential campaign of Bob Barr. Although we failed in the latter goal, we gleefully succeeded in the first, and thanks to a grassroots internetty word-of-mouth kind of a deal, we appear to have positively affected the lives of actual citizens as well, which astonishes and delights us to this day. We really never thought FJM would be for anyone but us. We are thrilled and kind of humbled to have been proven wrong.

We thank all of you for the kind emails, and the tips, and the support. To each and every person who ever contacted us: hat tip to you.

Perhaps the future holds another project for us on which to waste massive amounts of time. For now, we will leave the site and the archives up as a testament to the fact that if you work hard enough, and blow off enough social occasions, and stare at the internet enough, and get nerdy enough, and repeatedly ignore entreaties from your friends and loved ones to please God stop blogging about Bill Plaschke and get out of the house it's a beautiful day!, then you, too, can...have a blog.

Again, from the bottom of our hearts, thank you. And as Joe Morgan himself might say:

"I really haven't seen them play...slidepiece...Dave Concepcion."


dak, Junior, and Ken
Unfortunately, Joe Morgan has not been fired (or has he?) and continues to make ESPN's Sunday Night Baseball a truly unwatchable affair. FJM can maybe claim they had something to do with Harold Reynolds getting canned in Bristol, but this probably had more to do with his inappropriate behavior toward a female personal assistant at an Outback Steakhouse. Nonetheless, we faithful readers know how much these people suck, and we know that Moneyball was not written by Oakland GM Billy Beane and an evil, chess-playing computer that hates stolen bases and fun.

You can still read the archives online, and KT, dak and Junior - we aspire to be half the snarky, insipid meta-critics that you guys are.

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